


Secrets

by fangirlingtodeath513



Series: Writers of Destiel Challenges [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood, Blow Jobs, Demisexual Castiel (Supernatural), Demisexuality, First Kiss, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Gunshot Wounds, Hand Jobs, M/M, Nurse Castiel (Supernatural), Roommates, Vigilante Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-24 00:06:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21328939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirlingtodeath513/pseuds/fangirlingtodeath513
Summary: Dean and Cas both have secrets, ones that will change the course of their friendship forever.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Writers of Destiel Challenges [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1369456
Comments: 16
Kudos: 181
Collections: Dean and Cas Bingo, Writers of Destiel Lusty Lexis





	Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> Woo, back with another bingo fill/lusty lexis prompt fill! This is an old one for lusty lexis, week 19's 'hand jobs' prompt. This is also a fill for the 'demisexual' square on my Dean/Cas Bingo card :) You can find the masterpost for this bingo right [here](https://fangirlingtodeath513.tumblr.com/post/187103213249/fangirlingtodeath513s-dean-and-cas-bingo).
> 
> Huge thank you to the lovely [fpwoper](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FPwoper/pseuds/FPwoper) for beta reading this for me!

The first time Dean comes home with a bullet wound, it’s easy to hide from Castiel. It’s the middle of winter, so his many layers and leather jacket aren’t even questioned by his roommate. Castiel just smiles at him and holds out the bag of popcorn on his lap. 

“Doctor Who marathon before the Christmas special. Would you like to join me?”

Dean smiles back and waves, wincing as the movement pulls at his wound. “Absolutely. Let me just grab a shower and then I’ll be out.”

Castiel nods and turns his attention to the TV, so Dean takes the opportunity to escape to his bedroom. His mask and costume get shoved under his bed. He’ll deal with the blood and bullet hole later. For now, he makes his way to their shared bathroom with a fresh change of clothes. He cranks the shower on, peeling off his layers of clothes and groaning softly as he finally catches a glimpse of the wound. It’s nothing more than a graze on his bicep but  _ God _ does it sting. He cleans the wound carefully before stepping into the shower. It’s nowhere near deep enough for stitches, so he slaps a bandage over it after his shower and tugs a Henley on over it. He cleans up the bloody gauze and stuffs it into the bottom of the trash can before joining Castiel in the living room.

The second time he comes home wounded, it’s a stab wound to his thigh that narrowly missed his femoral artery, as far as he can tell. The wound’s not too deep, maybe three or four inches, but it still makes him limp all the way to their apartment door. There’s no way to hide it, so he opens the door with a believable lie on his tongue, but Castiel isn’t there. The apartment is dark and silent and he finds a note on the whiteboard hanging on their fridge.

_ Dean, _

_ Went out for drinks with Meg. Be back soon. _

He breathes a sigh of relief, heading straight for the bathroom. His leg fucking aches but it’s worth it. That college girl he’d saved from being assaulted is worth it, no matter how bad it hurts to stitch his own leg closed.

The bloody gauze and extra thread are buried in the trash can, but Dean ends up replacing it with a new bag and dropping the old down the trash chute at the end of the hallway.

Castiel is fumbling with his key when Dean comes back, struggling to get it into the deadbolt. Dean chuckles, taking the keys from him and unlocking the door.

“Hello, Dean.” Cas grins at him, stumbling slightly as he heads into the apartment. Dean reaches a hand out to steady him, smiling when Castiel shoots him a grateful look.

“Drinks with Meg, huh?”

Castiel hums. “She got a position at the same hospital as me. Different department, but the same building at least.”

“That’s awesome, Cas,” Dean says, smiling. “Congrats, I’m really happy for you.”

“It’ll be nice to have a friend at work,” Cas says through a yawn.

Dean chuckles, steering Castiel toward his bedroom. “Go to bed before you pass out in the kitchen.”

Castiel giggles, saluting Dean with two fingers before crawling into bed, clothes and all. Dean shakes his head, smiling fondly as he pulls Cas’s bedroom door closed. 

The third time is the time he gets caught, though the lecture he gets isn’t the one he’s expecting.

He’s got a bullet lodged in his shoulder and Castiel is working a night shift at the hospital, so Dean doesn’t bother hiding the wound as he walks into their apartment. Castiel is lounging on the couch with a book in his hands and his black-rimmed glasses perched on his nose. Dean freezes in the doorway, quickly shoving his mask into his backpack. Castiel doesn’t look at him, which is odd, so Dean quietly creeps toward the bathroom.

“Do you want some help with that?”

Dean winces as Castiel’s voice travels through their small apartment. Cas is a nurse, and he  _ did _ offer…

“Yeah, if you don’t mind.” He hears Castiel set his book down, so Dean grunts softly and heads for the bathroom, tossing his backpack into his bedroom on the way by. He sits on the edge of the tub, peeling his shirt off with a pained groan as Castiel walks in. His eyes scan the length of Dean’s exposed torso before zeroing in on the bullet wound to his shoulder.

He doesn’t say anything, which Dean thinks is worse than if he’d just yelled. Cas putters around the bathroom, collecting forceps and bandages and the bottle of alcohol they keep in the cabinet. He kneels in front of Dean, forceps in hand. “This isn’t going to feel good, you might want something to hold on to.” He pours the alcohol over the forceps and Dean idly watches the excess swirl down the bathtub drain.

Dean grits his teeth as Castiel starts digging for the bullet. He finds it relatively quickly, which is a relief. He leaves it on the counter while he cleans and stitches the wound, taping a bandage over it.

“You’re mad at me,” Dean finally says, breaking the tense silence of the bathroom.

Castiel shoots him an exasperated glare. “Of course I’m angry with you, you idiot. You live with a nurse and you still insist on caring for your own wounds.”

Dean blinks at him, confused. “You’re… not mad at me for doing what I’ve been doing?”

Castiel rolls his eyes, washing his hands. “Dean, I’ve known you were The Hunter since I first heard about him. I’m not an idiot.”

“You’ve known this entire time? Why didn’t you say anything?”

Castiel shrugs. “I figured you’d tell me when you were ready to.”

From then on, Castiel cleans his wounds and bandaged him up. It’s a welcome relief from having to take care of himself and it gives him more time with Castiel. 

As the weeks go on, Cas gets quieter and quieter until he barely says more than hello to Dean. When Dean comes home with a knife wound and Castiel doesn’t even say hello, Dean grabs his hand as he turns toward the bathroom, frowning. 

“Cas, what’s going on with you? You’ve barely said three words to me in the last few days.”

Castiel sighs heavily. “Just personal things. I’m fine.”

Dean’s frown deepens. “You wanna talk about it? We’ve been friends for a decade, you know I won’t judge you.”

He hesitates for a moment but eventually nods. “While I take care of your arm, sure.”

He follows Castiel to the bathroom, taking a seat on the lid of the toilet so Castiel can sit on the edge of the tub to treat his wound.

“So what’s goin’ on, Cas?” He winces as Castiel cleans the wound, and he has to grit his teeth as Cas sews it closed.

“Do you remember that night in high school… your seventeenth birthday?”

Dean thinks for a moment, eyebrows furrowed as he nods. “You told me you were gay that night. And asexual.”

Castiel hums, his tongue poking between his lips as he ties off the final stitch. “I may have to amend that admission.”

Dean raises an eyebrow, staying still as Castiel presses a bandage over the wound. “Why?”

Castiel’s eyes stay fixed on Dean’s wound despite the fact that he’s done treating it. “Because I’ve been wondering what you taste like for almost a month now.”

Dean blinks at his roommate, opening and closing his mouth a few times as he tries to figure out what to say to that.

“I’m sorry, I can control myself, I swear, I just needed to tell you. I don’t—mmph!”

Dean cuts him off, grabbing the front of Cas’s shirt and pulls him into a kiss with nearly a decade of feelings behind it. Castiel melts against him, careful to avoid the knife wound.

Eventually, they break away, though it doesn’t really seem like either of them wants to. They take a moment to breathe like if they say anything, it’ll shatter the room around them. After a moment, though, they both break into wide grins and lean in for another kiss.

“So, wait, you  _ want _ to have sex with me?” Dean asks, fingers trailing lazily up and down Castiel’s sides as they make out. 

Castiel nods enthusiastically, though he looks nervous. Dean grins, pulling him into another kiss.

“So not asexual then?”

“Demisexual, I think,” Castiel murmurs, tilting his head as Dean’s lips trail down his neck. “Means I have to have an emotional attachment to someone before I’ll be sexually attracted to them.”

Dean smirks. “You saying you’re emotionally attached to me, Cas? How sweet.”

Castiel rolls his eyes, leaning away from Dean’s mouth. “As much as I enjoy kissing you, can we move this elsewhere? I don’t particularly want my first time to be in our bathroom.

Dean laughs. “Yeah, fair enough. My bedroom or yours?”

Castiel stands, grabbing Dean’s hand and pulling him down the hallway to Dean’s bedroom. “Mine is useless, I don’t have anything that could help us if we decide to… you know.”

“You sure you wanna do this, Cas? We don’t have to.”

“I want to,” Castiel says adamantly, closing Dean’s bedroom door. “I just… don’t really know what to do,” he murmurs, cheeks heating with embarrassment. 

Dean cups his cheek, smiling and kissing him gently. “That’s okay. I can show you.”

Dean relocates them to the bed before they start anything, sitting and urging Castiel to straddle his lap. “Why don’t we just kiss for a bit and go from there?”

Castiel seems to relax at that, immediately dipping to capture Dean in a slow, tentative kiss. Dean smiles into it, gripping Cas’s hips lightly. 

Castiel’s the one that makes the first move, fingers idly trailing down Dean’s chest, tracing the muscles and the old scars. “What now?” he whispers against Dean’s lips, one palm resting over Dean’s heart. It’s thudding against his ribcage and there’s no way Cas can’t feel it.

“Whatever you want. We can take this as slow or fast as you want to.”

Castiel hums. “I think I want you out of those clothes.”

Dean smirks, guiding Castiel off of his lap so he can shed his pants and boxers, standing still as Castiel’s eyes scan the length of his body. His gaze pauses rather obviously where Dean’s cock hangs heavy and half-hard between his legs and Castiel licks his lips, which is definitely a good sign. 

“Gonne leave me all alone like this or are you gonna join me?” Dean murmurs, trying to keep his voice seductive as he tugs at the bottom of Castiel’s shirt. Cas blinks up at him like he hadn’t really thought of that, quickly shedding his clothes until he’s as naked as Dean, kneeling on the bed with nothing but socks on. Castiel’s eyes float back down to Dean’s cock, fingers twitching at his side. 

“Do you want to touch?” Dean whispers, raising an eyebrow at Castiel. He nods jerkily, shuffling closer to Dean and reaching out, fingertips brushing against the smooth skin of Dean’s shaft. Dean shivers at the touch, eyes fluttering closed momentarily. The reaction seems to spur Cas on, his hand wrapping around Dean’s cock and giving it a few curious strokes, eyes wide as he watched Dean harden under his touches.

“What, um…” Cas pauses, wetting his lips and meeting Dean’s gaze. “What should I do now?”

Dean chuckles. “Depends on how far you wanna take it tonight. We can keep it to just kissing and handjobs if you want.”

Castiel frowns. “I want to taste you.”

Dean raises his eyebrows in shock. “You… oh. That’s… w-we can… yeah,” he stutters out, cheeks undoubtedly flushed a bright red. Castiel smirks, brushing his thumb over the head of Dean’s cock. 

“Is that something you want?”

“God,  _ yes _ ,” Dean groans, gasping softly as Cas’s tongue darts out to flick one of Dean’s nipples. Castiel hums, shuffling around until he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, almost eye-level with Dean’s cock. Dean bites his lip as Cas caresses the skin curiously with his fingers, eyes fluttering closed.

“So do I just…” Castiel trails off, blinking up at Dean. Dean cracks his eyes open, smiling softly.

“Whatever you want, Cas, you don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna. Normally people will, uh, kinda wrap their lips around the head, maybe tongue the slit a little. As long as you keep your teeth to yourself, you can do whatever the hell you want.”

Cas chuckles but sits up anyway, tongue tentatively swiping over Dean’s tip, no doubt collecting the precum that had been beading there. Dean shudders, fingers tangling in Cas’s hair gently. Humming, Cas leans forward and pulls the head of Dean’s cock into his mouth, tongue circling the tip curiously.

It’s the best blowjob Dean’s gotten in his life. Cas takes his time, exploring every inch of skin covering Dean’s shaft. By the time Dean steps away, he’s shaking with his need to come, but Cas has never actually done this before and Dean’s doesn’t really want to be inconsiderate and come in his mouth. Cas whines as he pulls away, making Dean laugh breathlessly.

“Sorry, I was gonna come.”

Cas pouts. “I know. Was I unclear when I said I wanted to taste you?”

Dean shivers, blinking a few times. Is he really… upset? “No, I just didn’t want to… you’ve never done this before, someone coming in your mouth is a weird feeling.”

Castiel hums. “Let me decide that for myself. I’m a big boy, Dean, I know my limits.’

Dean nods slowly, gasping as Cas’s eager mouth encompasses his cock once again. It only takes a few swipes of his tongue over Dean’s head before he’s coming in Cas’s mouth with a grunt, clutching his shoulder in an attempt to ground himself.

Castiel works him through it and Dean can feel him swallow when he pulls off, which is remarkably hot. Castiel leans back, smiling shyly. “Was that… okay?”

Dean chuckles breathlessly. “That was awesome, Cas. Want me to return the favor?”

Castiel tilts his head. “Maybe just your hand?”

Dean smiles softly, despite the fact that he’s dying to taste Castiel. “Just a handjob, promise.”

They shuffle back onto the bed, propped against the pillows as they kiss. Dean runs his tongue along Cas’s bottom lip and the man opens up to him almost immediately, so Dean lets his hands wander. He slides them down Castiel’s side and over the swell of his ass, giving it a squeeze before he grabs Cas’s thigh and hauls him closer. He slips a hand between them, thumb rubbing over the head of Cas’s cock, making the man gasp against Dean’s mouth.

“Oh, Dean,” he murmurs, grasping Dean’s bicep. Dean smiles, kissing him softly.

“I got you, don’t worry.”

He kisses down Cas’s neck as he jacks him, his attention locked on every moan and whimper coming from Castiel. It’s intoxicating getting to see and hear Cas like this after being in love with him for so long.

Cas grunts when he comes, nails digging into Dean’s arm as he coats Dean’s hand and both of their stomachs. Cas buries his face in Dean’s neck as he catches his breath, shivering through the aftershocks of his orgasm.

Eventually, Dean draws himself away, wiping them down with his discarded boxers and kissing Cas softly. “You staying in here tonight?”

Castiel smiles sleepily, burrowing deeper into Dean’s bed. “Mhmmmm.”

Dean laughs quietly, brushing his fingers through Cas’s hair before climbing into bed next to him. 

“Night, Cas,” he whispers, though Cas is already sound asleep next to him, relaxed and peaceful in his sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Find **this fic** on [Tumblr](https://fangirlingtodeath513.tumblr.com/post/188848608909/secrets-a-destiel-fanfic-rating-explicit) and [Pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/901418)  
  
Find **me** on [Tumblr](https://fangirlingtodeath513.tumblr.com/) and [Pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.io/fangirlingtodeath513)  
  
**Please don’t post my works anywhere without my permission.**


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